5.27.2009

sad and hurt enough..my world turn dark

im extreamly sad now,this moment..
today i realize who am i in your eyes.
im not a good girl...im not able to trust.
my sky turn dark...i cant feel anything now,
feel cold....scary...
you know how i feel when u say out those words?
you thought i purposely want to make yo worry?
am i those kind of people always go out 'wet' ?
is it because i have car only you think i can go 'wet' without telling you? tell you the truth here, if i really wanna do so, no need to give me a car i will also can do it!!!!!!! please think of me!!!!
u know me from the day i born , but you still think that im this kind of girl..
in your eyes, i am like tat? what i had did so far , for you is just nothing....today i finally know and again prove that, you are not trusting me at all!

actually i know u din't trust me when i was secondery,
you have stalk me !! i knew it !
send me to school and park the car far away from gate and watched me!!!! see whether im going to other places?! you know, when that moment i know you do this to me how sad i am?
because prove that you are not trusting me !
today, again! u don't trust your girl!!!! at all...
i never say im very geng now! i never think about that, i can earn now so i can do whatever i want! i never!!! but , you though im like this!? why!!!!!!
why cursing me? im doing my assignments and test,i ask myself, i really work hard..mayb not very hard.. but i really did on it, but plz don cursing me. im not as good as sister, i know it..
i specheless, nothing to say, no need to defence, because from the begining, you are not allow me to do so. what for i defence myself? for let you scold more badly?
do you know just now i was sweating when im driving, do u know how scare am i when i driving >100km/h in LDP...im scare i know its dagerous.. but wat to do.

you know how hurt am i when u said those words on me? nobody will know except me.
im not saying tat im really a 100% good girl who stay at home 24 hours and b like wat in ur mind. i don't know wat i suppose to do now instead of kill myself, mayb tis is the best way.
no need worry on me anymore, no need scold anymore..
please don't always say you are alone there working hard. i know all of that. but meaing wat? u give me presure...stress..u can spread out urs to me but who can i spread my stressness to? both of you ...i know both situation, but plz don't pushing me, i will collaps soon..very soon, i can feel myself heavy now, cant move, can't talk ,cant think tears is droping without crying.
is hard to say out here, many people will think that im not mature if im still saying this.
today, i finally know the feeling that heartbreaking. pain. sad but still laughing on myself like a mad girl.

5 comments:

sheepu's world said...

i have nothing to say also...
feel "wu nai" and abit guilty..mayb lok and me shouldnt asked u to stay back 2night

cassiopeia said...

nothing to do with both of you la..
is fine to let me know what both of they think about me..
just , im sad enough..
don't worry.

leehee said...

erm...althought i dint join u all to9...but i know wat happen d...angelyna.....be brave!!!prove that u r not wat they thinking of u!!!prove it!!!hehe.....

Priscillia said...

Yuan yuan...no matter what, i know you cna handle it. Do not ever think of suicide, is very stupid. You live for yourself, not for others. AS time passed, thing will become better.

I will alwys by your side supporting you. =)

akiosu said...

人啊,说过的话真的覆水难收。气在头上,什么东西都可以飙一堆出来,结果伤害自己,还伤了亲爱的人。

类似你的事情,我经历过,大概了解了那种痛心的感觉(当然自身还是会比较清楚,因我不晓得事实如何)可以说,大概,我们是相同的吧

家家都有一本难念的经。也许相处沟通的方式不一样,结果也会不一样。自己问心无愧,作出改变,让自己更有信心更有成就,别人就不会多说什么了。在家人的眼中,我们永远都是小孩子。

我们支持你呀!!有什么苦水可以尽情地泼,记得要让自己尽量开心一点,信心多一点,你一定可以的!

-每天做相同的事情,却想要不一样的结果是种奢望-

angye, 加油加油加油!!!

^__^